Love Wins Always

Go to Love Wins Always to see more about our experience at our 4th of July picnic. Hugh Hollowell is an amazing man who lives among the poor in the inner-city of Raleigh and truly loves them like Jesus. I have always thought our family would do our duty once a year to go and feed the homeless on Thanksgiving or Christmas when our kids got old enough, but after meeting Hugh through his blog and then in person at the 4th of July picnic, I have thought, no I would rather do what Hugh does. Anyone can slop food on a plate without ever making eye contact or saying anything more than a "hi", but if you read and see how Hugh enters into peoples lives... it is just amazing. It is truly what Jesus would look like if He were to live in downtown Raleigh. I saw what Hugh sees, hurting people in really tough places with not many who really care about the long run of their life.

Please also pray about supporting Hugh or get your church involved. He is doing a ministry that almost no one wants to do. I dirty, it's messy, it's hard, there are probably more disappointments than rejoicing sometimes, but isn't that what Jesus dealt with when He walked on the earth. Not many people followed him, even some of his closest friends betrayed him but he did it because He loved... and Love won in the end.

A small disclaimer

I feel like my last post needs a little clarity. It probably was not as harsh as it sounds, but we all know how we walk in a room and say things in a way we did not exactly mean to say them. That was sort of the situation last night. Months ago I still would have had an extreme response, but I was just so surprised by how I responded, and I wasn't mad or frustrated or piously spiritual, I was just calmly happy... and it really shocked me. During all this I was able to hear God speak to me while I was cleaning. It was such an awesome experience.

A Miracle of a different kind

When we think of miracles, we typically think of someone being healed of something, a stray person coming to know the Lord, financial blessing at just the right time..., but I don't think we rejoice enough in this type of miracle or really even give it much voice...

Tonight my husband came down after spending time putting the kids to bed, while I sat resting for a few minutes at the computer, and he said, "Are you reading blogs? I hate coming downstairs after putting the kids to bed and having to spend time cleaning the kitchen when I just want to sit down and rest."

Now for all of you out there who don't know me well, I spend all day every day on my feet mostly cooking, cleaning, schooling, disciplining, breaking up fights, refereeing arguments, attempting to train good behavior, changing diapers, running up and down the stairs, more disciplining, and more similar activities... chasing after 4 kids 4 and 1/2 years apart (wishing I could fit a run in to keep me sane) ... While my husband, sweet man that he is, sits at a desk all day, except for the break he takes at lunch to run 3-4 miles while listening to his ipod, and drives in a quiet car to and from work listening to sermons or music, or just sits in silence sometimes praying...

Now I do not know why I responded this way, but in the past you probably would have seen fire come out of my eyes with that comment, and an argument or anger or coldness that would have lasted well into the night and possibly a few days with the expectation of sincere groveling and penance. But tonight, when he said that, I sat there for a second, then quietly got up and began cleaning the kitchen. Even while it was happening I felt like it was an out of body experience. I thought, "Why am I doing this? Why didn't I say anything. What is wrong with me?" And then it hit me, and I wanted to leap out of my skin and throw a party. Something in my "spirit" took over in that situation and I did the right thing!!!! I responded to my husband with respect and honor. I honestly cannot ever remember responding like that in any similar situation. And then I thought, "We can go to France!!!!"

One thing that has been on my heart for the past year is that a bad tree cannot bear good fruit, and a good tree cannot bear bad fruit, basically meaning, what is inside comes out when we are put under pressure, and I can assure you that alot has come out of me these past 10 years of marriage that is not good. And I have been very broken and have spent much time in prayer and in scripture about it this this past year... and I just saw the first fruits of my labor... and wow it was beautiful.

So the reason I share this is not because I want you to think my husband is a jerk, because he is not (I will share what he did for our 10th anniversary). I think God just has to allow us to go through things sometimes to show us we need to grow more because there is something bad on the inside. Or he wants to show us that we have broken a bondage that we have been under, and now when put under pressure good comes out.

Tonight I saw a miracle of a different kind, and it was beautiful.

Happy 4th of July!!

I always seem to be a day late with most of my holiday greetings; birthdays, holidays, anniversaries, etc. ... so...

Happy Independence Day!!! Hope your holiday was as awesome as ours!! We celebrated our 10th anniversary on the 3rd, helped feed the homeless on the in downtown Raleigh on the 4th, went to a Mudcats game with family on the 4th, watched our first fireworks show in 7 years after the game , and then went to an all day track meet for our oldest son on the 5th squeezing in a Saturday night church service at a not yet launched church plant we feel God has led us to be a part of in downtown Raleigh.

It was an amazing holiday with "the cookout with the homeless" being the highlight of the weekend. They were so kind to us and our kids, and it made me realize they are real people with lives and families and pasts, and parents who rejoiced at their birth... I met two guys specifically named Thomas and James. I was blessed by my conversation with them, and you could see it made them feel special that someone would treat them like a person. I found out that James had a son that was hit by a car and killed when he was 9 and a few other things about his life. I found out that Thomas was about to turn 40 and we joked about mid-life crisis. One man gave Phelicia a little "4th of July" toy airplane still in the plastic bag that he had probably picked up off the ground at some celebration in downtown Raleigh. It was so precious though, because he actually came up to me and asked if he could give it to her, and then gave it to me to hand to her. The respect that these people gave to Ken and I and our kids was amazing. Ken met a guy who had been in the military the same time he was, and they probably served close to the same time in Panama in the 80's.

I left there feeling more fulfilled than just about anything else I have done in my life... and I have done alot, especially in the name of "ministry". I felt like I was Jesus to some people that have heard alot about Jesus, but have not seen the unconditional love of Jesus in their life. I am so excited to go back and continue in these relationships, and make more friends. I realized these are people with hopes and dreams and hurts and families... we call them "homeless", but they are people who were given names at birth with the hopes that they would succeed in this thing called life. I do not know why they are not able to sleep and cook and live with a roof over their heads right now in their lives, but all I know is Jesus loves them, and He does not call them, "homeless". He calls them by name, and He says "you are special", and "I have a purpose for creating you, "and "I love you and care about where you are at."

I may write more on some of this later... but for now enjoy your holiday!! and I pray God will get you out of your comfort zone and rock your world like He has done in mine.

Belling the Cat

I fear our bluebird population has taken a reprieve somewhere else for a time...

We have two birdhouses sitting on our back porch. I did not set them there with the thought that a bird would come and make a home in it, I probably did it one day while cleaning for someone to look at the house and I thought, "Decoration for the deck!!" They were birdhouses Levi and Austin had made with Cubscouts and I was hoping to put them up somewhere outside because birds will come to our yard if there is food and a house.

So forgetting I had put those birdhouses there, about a week ago I noticed a number of birds coming up on our deck and remaining there hopping around and playing on the railing. It was so awesome. I kept saying I wonder why the birds are coming up on our deck, and one of my sons finally said, "Mom it's the birdhouses." Well, we went out and looked in the birdhouses and sure enough they were building nests in them. We could stand inside the house and because of the closed window could watch them from 2-3 feet away coming and going bringing grass and straw for their nests, chasing off other birds from their territory... It was just amazing and something we all enjoyed doing.

Last Saturday, though, after we had watched the birds for a while we were all getting started with our day, and I heard a sort of a thump; sounding something like what our cat makes when he bangs into the door or falls from the screen trying to let us know he wants in (something I thought we had broken him of). So I looked through the back door and saw him, and because I did not want him to scare the bluebirds away I quickly opened the door and let him in... but as he came in I noticed he had a bluebird in his mouth (it makes me want to scream just typing about it).

I began to scream for Ken (much like you would if you had seen a mouse and were wanting someone else to come and take care of it) and I kept screaming until Ken came in where I was. He found the cat hiding behind the couch and got Tiger (our cat) to drop the bird. We now have a bird (not sure if it is dead or alive) in our house laying behind the couch. They were right by the front door, so Ken got one of the kids to hold the door open and got something flat to sort of scoop under it and as soon as he did that it the bird sprang to life and flew out the door.

I was very happy to know my cat had not taken the life of one of the beautiful bluebirds we watch every day, but I will say the news must have gotten around the bird kingdom because we have not seen many birds of any kind near our porch and even on our bird feeder in a couple of days. I sure hope in their little minds they will forget what happened and come back, or a new group clueless to "Tiger the bird eating cat" will come back so we can watch them again.

Ah the joys of the "life-cycle" and "survival of the fittest". Maybe I should put a bell around his neck as a sign to the bird kingdom that I'm on their side.

Prayer for Ethan

I have a very special prayer I would like to ask you to join me in tomorrow...

I have a cousin that I love dearly who has a son with Autism. If you don't know anyone who has a child with severe autism, it can be very hard on the family. Robby and Karen are the parents (Robby being my cousin) and Ethan is there precious son. He and my oldest son are only one day apart. They are both 7 years old turning 8 in October. My cousin and his wife have spent many years and alot of money turning over every rock in hopes to help their son get better, if even just a little bit. Also as a child gets older with autism the challenges get greater for the family. But as with every physical ailment we can come to the end of solutions and then have to turn to the Great Physician.

So, if God can raise the dead, why can't he bring healing to this child, if even just a little. Maybe not overnight, maybe slowly, maybe enough so that they would never have to entertain the thought of an institution... but possible. For those of you that have been following our modern day miracle with Tricia & Nate, anything is possible... even today.

Tomorrow they are taking Ethan to be prayed over by the Elders of the church. This will take place 5:00pm Eastern time. So Please join me in prayer for this family and this precious little boy. It's hard for most of us to even begin to understand what they go through day to day without an end in sight... So, I will be praying that they will find hope and healing through this step of faith. I didn't mention, but this is a big step of faith for my cousin.

So...
Father I lift up this family and little boy to you including his older sister who I didn't mention above. You love them and care so much for them. You have allowed this in their life for Your purpose, and you promised not to give us more than we can handle. So please show this family Your grace and mercy. Show them how this situation can be used for your glory. My personal request is that you would heal Ethan completely. That they would be able to hear the words, "I love you mom and dad," from a son who cannot outwardly show his thankfulness for how much his parents do for him. Give Robbie and Karen comfort and wisdom. Heal their hearts where it has broken. Refresh them where the life has exhausted them. Let us see your power tomorrow. You tell us You want to do more than we can even think or imagine... so please let us see You here and now. Thank you for all that You do for us... and for all that You are going to do. We love you Lord...

Let's have a Party!!

Let's have a party!!... No we have not sold our house yet, but I always love it after someone comes to "see" our house, because it is so clean it feels like a hotel, and I always feel like I need to invite a bunch of friends over and have a big party. I felt like I had run a marathon after cleaning and painting and staining (the deck) and planting and mowing, all while keeping all my kids occupied. But since Ken had been sick, I hadn't told you guys that part, I did it all!!... and I accomplished my goal. I felt like I needed to take a victory lap... actually I think I did, around the house.

It's sad that you go to that much effort and stress for a 15 minute visit. So if any of you are in the neighborhood, please stop in. It probably won't look like this for long... at least until the next family comes to look at our house. :-)

We have had some interested people, one family in particular, maybe not the ones who came yesterday, but I continue to feel confident that God has the people chosen already, it is just not His timing yet. Thanks for praying.

House Viewing

Okay today at 6:30pm, or anytime throughout the day everybody needs to be praying. Not that God needs our prayers to act, but sometimes He acts because of our prayers.

I got a little more notice this time, but someone emailed me last week and said they were seriously interested in our house. We emailed back and forth numerous times sending pictures and asking and answering questions. Now, I'm not sure why they used the word seriously, because there are a millions of houses on the market right now, and to me there is no reason why our house should stand our any more than any other ones... unless maybe God already spoke to them about this one and He needs to move us on towards the passion HE put in our hearts 5 or 6 years ago (sharing a relevant Christ with the people of Europe).

We have recently come across a church plant, that is just in the process of launching in another part of town. We have been praying about becoming a part of this group and learning and experiencing more of the hands on process of planting another church... and maybe GOD wants to move us closer. We have no idea. All we know is tomorrow is a good day... (except for the frantic cleaning and straightening I will be doing while trying to keep my kids occupied and keeping them from messing up what I have just cleaned)... and God is in control and knows the plan, and IT IS GOOD!

Homeschooling... Why I do it...

Homeschooling... Yes I am a homeschooling mom. People do it for so many reasons. I do not think it is the right thing for everybody. The only reason I do it is because God led me. A friend gave me some books that spoke about a philosophy by Charlotte Mason... and because of some different learning styles my oldest son has, this is the main reason I homeschool... and I love it.

Once upon a time, there were two farmers. The first farmer had many acres planted in rows and rows of corn as far as the eye could see. In the springtime, enormous machines would plow the fields, making long, straight lines in the soil. Then other enormous machines would drop in the seeds so that they were all just the right distance apart. The young plants were fertilized in order to grow a tremendous number of the largest, most robust ears of corn you could ever see. Later, large airplanes would dust the corn with poison to kill the insects that might be lurking, waiting to harm the crop. Finally, a tractor would come and cut down the corn while many workers moved quickly to get the harvest loaded onto huge trucks. The farmer was very proud of himself. “This corn will travel all around the world. Look how much man can accomplish in just one season!” he said.
The second farmer did not have many acres planted in rows as far as the eye could see. He only had a small plot in his back yard that was full of all sorts of growing things. He had tomatoes, cucumbers, squash, okra, pumpkins, herbs and flowers, and even a peach tree! This farmer plowed his field himself, so sometimes his furrows were squiggly instead of straight. He planted the seeds himself, so sometimes they were too close together and he had to thin them. When the young plants sprouted, he carefully pulled out any weeds that threatened them. He kept a sharp eye out for harmful insects so that he could prevent infestation. He watered the plants deeply every day, and soon this thriving garden became a joy to his life. At harvest time the farmer made a simple soup and sat down to eat with his family. “Thank you, Father, for what you can accomplish in the fullness of time,” he said.
Educators today face enormous pressure to be like the first farmer. They are to produce results as quickly and efficiently as possible. At the beginning of each school year, they are presented with curriculum standards and scope-and-sequence charts. In many instances they are expected to cover a lesson per day, regardless of whether or not their students have mastered the material. Then, at the end of the year, one test (usually multiple-choice) will tell them, their principals, the students’ parents, and the media how well they did their job. One of the many problems with this all-too-common industrial model of education is that teaching the learner has been overlooked in favor of teaching a curriculum. Let us not forget that education is not a product which can be put together on an assembly line. In the words of Mason, it is an atmosphere, a discipline, and a life.
Even though the first farmer had the ability to manipulate nature, I do not think anyone reading this blog would argue that food that has been processed or spent weeks ripening on a truck is of better quality than what you grow in your own back yard or pick up at the local farmer’s market. (As a southern girl, I can tell you that the best tomatoes you will ever eat have been left on the vine to ripen in the sun! Yum!) Children, too, are living organisms who will grow on their own time table. Yes, there are things you can do as a teacher to speed things along, but meddle too much and the harvest will not be as sweet. As Mason said, let us allow our students to take from a reading what they are ready to digest. Let them explore their world freely. Let them make connections on their own. Prepare the ground with a loving environment, carefully pull out the weeds by helping with habit formation, let them drink deeply from God’s word, and then leave the rest to the fullness of time.

Happy Father's Day Dad! You are my Hero!

I am not sure I can say enough about my dad. If he reads this I think he would be shocked... but it's all those things that you don't say, but should... and I don't have enough time or space, but I just want to introduce you to him.

I am so proud of my father. He has influenced my life in ways he will never know. I'm sure many people come to the end of their life and wished they had done things differently at times, but he has 4 children all deeply in love with Christ and serving the Lord... And as a believer, to get to live and witness that is about as great a heritage as anyone could ask for. He was the first one in his family to become a Christian. His family was very poor, and even had some skeletons in the closet that can get strongholds on a family. But he and his siblings broke the cycle. His parents and even his father who had been an alcoholic, eventually accepted Christ and never looked back. And is I am correct, everyone of the grandkids from his parents, are walking with Christ and many very involved in ministry and Bible studies today.

My father was introduced to church as a child through a bus ministry and eventually made a profession of faith and answered the call to ministry. At the age of 18 he boarded a train from Clovis, California, with one trunk holding all his worldly possessions, and headed for Oklahoma to Bible College to become a preacher. He is the only one in his family that left California to follow the calling God made on His life, and for that I honor him.

He then went into music ministry, and led many church choirs, taught music at two Bible Colleges, and eventually pastored a number of churches. His love is music and even has a masters in voice, but his heart is lost souls. He is an amazing pastor and teacher. I sat under his preaching most of my childhood, and therefore feel very discipled by him. I still think of illustrations and sermons that sunk deep into my heart and I forever pull them up in tough situations.

One interesting story in particular, though, that has made one of the deepest imprints on my life to this day, was when we were coming home from visiting our family in California. It was Sunday morning, and even though we were traveling we did not miss church. So we were somewhere in the desert of New Mexico (and I mean desert) around 10:30am we got off on an exit and proceeded to find a church. I'm not sure how we found it because I'm not even sure there was a gas station, but we did find a church, and went in and sat at the back as it had already started.

Now we're talking middle of nowhere in the desert of New Mexico, and there were probably not 10 people in the small church building. Now to say the piano player was horrible was an understatement, and they were struggling through a hymn as we tried to sneak on the back pew. At the end of that song the person attempting to play the piano said their piano player was out of town and that she had prayed that God would send someone so that she would not have to play that morning.

Now I don't think I mentioned that my father was an amazing pianist. He is the kind of person who can sit down at the piano and play almost anything by ear, or with music, and also add all the fancy stuff. Therefore, my siblings and I started kind of looking at my dad wondering if he was going to say anything. Well, he sat there and let this poor lady struggle through one more song where she stopped a couple of times when she lost her place, or just couldn't find the right note, and would mentioned every time that she just knew God was going to send her a piano player that morning. Well, my father eventually raised his hand slightly and said, "I play the piano," and went up and helped lead us all into the presence of an amazing God.

Now don't stop reading because the story gets better. When the music was all done, a man walked up to the podium and turned to my father and said, "You wouldn't happen to be a preacher because our pastor is also out of town"... So my father sort of laughed and said, "Well actually I am the pastor," and ended up preaching the sermon that morning also. Amazingly, earlier that morning he had asked my mother to drive so that he could have a quiet time in the back of the van, where he just happened to go over a sermon he had preached before. I still stand amazed when I think about it.

It still brings tears to my eyes when I think of that story. God cared so much about that lady and her simple request that He used a family from Missouri on vacation in California, as the answer to her prayer. A simple family with parents who thought it was important to find a place to worship on Sunday mornings. We were the answer... that just blows me away. God used my parents who were just trying to be faithful to what they knew.

It convicts me to my core about why I don't pray in any and every situation, and why I put so much on myself to do things sometimes when God is just saying, "Come to me Gina because I really do care about the small things"... And just in typing this, God has impressed upon me that maybe if I would be faithful to the convictions He has put on my heart up to this point in my life I could be the answer to someone's prayer over and over and over again."

Thank you dad for being such an awesome example for me to follow. It's even in the small things you do now like staying faithful in a church and really getting involved no matter what life throws at you. I love you and can only hope to leave a legacy to my children as you have given to yours.

Nothing like the smell of napalm in the morning...

Nothing like waking up to the smell of strange smoke that looks like fog and you're trying to figure out if there is an electrical fire nearby or maybe a small war... We soon found out that it was the smoke from fires in eastern North Carolina. Now I'm thinking this is not L.A. ... we are in North Carolina where it actually rains... okay well it used to rain a few years ago...

Can anyone say "rapture"... Recently I often think, "floods, earthquakes, fires, wars... shouldn't we be seeing Christ in the clouds soon?" It's all so strange... so the kids and I are going to go drown our concerns at the local YMCA pool where there actually is water.

On a side note, if you think your day is stressful today, remember the Lawrenson's. Tricia a young twenty something with cystic fibrosis who just had the joy of experiencing a life long prayer of having a child, and who soon after had a lung transplant is having some complications which can be a by-product of a transplant. Please pray for this family as they are back in Durham in the hospital after only a short time home for testing and biopsy to try to figure out what is going on.

Remember also people like the Steven Curtis Chapman family, people in China and Myanmar many suffering without the hope of Christ, the orphans of Africa, and so many others who really know what it is to struggle and suffer. Yes, God cares about our smallest problems, but often our complaining just needs a fresh perspective.

Update on Kali Norris

I wanted to update any of those who had been praying for Kali Norris, the 13 year old who had disappeared from Franklinton, NC. She is fine and they are not sure what the circumstances are with everything that happened. Continue to pray for her and her family. She did plan on leaving the night she disappeared, but they are not sure if she is just rebelling, or if she has some other mental issues that are causing the strange behaviors. It's very scary for her parents because this has happened twice now and she is only 13.

Cleaned to the Closets in 4 Hours!!

It can be done!! I cleaned my house all the way to the closets yesterday in 4 hours! Someone emailed me from Craigslist at noon (someone I had communicated with before) and said they wanted to see our house (It is for sale) and asked if they could come by at 4pm. I looked around my house, panicked a little bit... and then said yes. I also began to think I am insane. I always told my husband I could get our house ready to look at in 24 hours... but this was going to be a miracle.

Now the reason I took on this daunting task is because the kids and I have been walking around our house everyday praying for the family that will buy it; thanking God that He knows the day and time it will be sold; and after lunch yesterday I had told the kids I felt like God wanted us to go on the the front porch and pray for the buyers of our house. When I went inside, I had this email waiting for me asking to see the house. It all happened so fast, and in such a way I felt like God was answering our prayers, how could I say no. (plus I have to admit I always like a little bit of a challenge). I have to say, though, it may take me a few days to find everything I stuffed under the beds or threw in a box and stored in the car for a few hours. But man our house is clean. It almost looks like a hotel. I am so impressed with myself... okay, I'm sure God is the one who miraculously helped me think and clean and organize those 4 crazy hours.

So now you all need to join us in prayer. God has taken us to the edge of our faith financially and really there is no other option except that He shows up or we basically do not pay our bills every month... of course we could go without food and electricity... but we sort of like that. It's crazy that in America you can have a really good job, but cannot get a loan to refinance things because of a mistake the bank made, and the credit card companies would rather you go into bankruptcy than work with you.

I am really not complaining because in my world God always shows up and I love it when He takes us to the edge and grows our faith because that means we are defeating Satan once again and often for the encouragement of someone else to see. This time in our lives has also let Ken and I understand what alot of people in America are going through financially and we really have compassion for them... especially if they don't know Christ. I don't see how you don't have a nervous break down without Christ if you're in a situation similar to ours. People are losing their home, some living in cars, some on the street... How does that happen? Now Ken and I know...

14 year old Kali Norris and family

I realize most of you who read this blog are not from the Youngsville/ Franklin County community, so I ask for you to pray for a family that we went to church with for many years. Ken and I were a part of this church for 8 years, and the assistant to the pastor has a daughter who is 13 years old and she has gone missing. Her name is Kali and she has had a recent condition that makes her have seizures and she left her house one time before and went missing for a short time. She was scheduled to see a neurologist this week because of her recent uncharacteristic behavior and instances of memory loss.

This is a precious family in ministry who is walking a road no one ever wants to go down. You can go to this website to see a picture of her and just to know who you're praying for. You can also go to the website for missing and explioted children.

China - A Disaster for Humanity... An Opportunity for God

The missions pastor at Healing Place church posted this from a missionary they are working with on the ground in China. Praise God that everything that He allows can be used to spread the gospel. Remember this the next time your life doesn't make sense or seams to be in shambles... it could just be the open door for millions to come to know Him.

Two weeks after the earthquake, 5 million people are homeless and an expected 80,000 have lost their lives.

The Chinese government have done a commendable job restoring order and providing shelter and food to the victims in the more populated areas.

Aftershocks continue, with one 6.4 killing and destroying homes on Sunday. Meanwhile, dams are threatening to burst as are “lakes” which have formed by falling debris and landslides. Flooding is a serious threat with heavy rains expected these couple of days.

I am in the earthquake zone a team of Disaster Relief trainers. We will be visiting the earthquake site tomorrow then conducting a two day seminar for House Church volunteers Thursday and Friday.

We will also be conducting training for the staff of relief agencies and foreign teams.

We will also be strategizing with House Church leaders about forming a LONG TERM PLAN TO PLANT CHURCHES in the regions where they are conducting relief.

There is an amazing need and an amazing opportunity. Keep praying for the people of this country who on a normal day do not have the opportunity to hear about Jesus.

Michael W. Smith - funeral for daughter Maria

As a follow up to my last post... our worship leader's brother traveled and recorded with Michael W. Smith for many years, and he (the brother) and another musician friend of Michael W. Smith's went to the funeral of little Maria. This is a letter he wrote in regards to the funeral service. Please continue to keep this family in your prayers, especially the son who backed over little Maria.

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for all your prayers for the Chapman family. They certainly have felt the love of God over the past few days from all those who have lifted them up in prayer during this unimaginably difficult time.

Kari and I are flying back to LA as I write after an amazing two days in Nashville. This was life changing. The name of the Lord was exalted in ways that we could never retell. We are in awe at His grace, compassion and mercy. Little Maria's life, although short, has already moved mightily in peoples lives to bring Him glory.

Last night the entire family stood in the church as a long line of friends and acquaintances greeted them, hugged them, cried with them and loved on them. The Chapman family and Steven's ministry has obviously impacted so many. They stood there for more than 4 hours before one of the pastors finally stopped it and had hundreds still remaining in line just sit down and then Steven apologetically, but so graciously addressed the entire group.

At the funeral, both Michael W. Smith and Matt Redman helped lead everyone in worship. Matt led us in a song we often sing that he wrote, "Blessed Be the Name of the Lord." It was amazing to watch the Chapman family sing with loud voices as they hugged one another, "He gives and takes away. He gives and takes away. My heart will choose to say, 'Lord, blessed be your name.'" This song will never be the same to me personally.

We worshipped and sang for 30-minutes. And then the Chapman's celebrated Maria by sharing stories and talking about her for almost an hour and a half, praising God for her life and acknowledging that she was safe in the arms of Jesus. All the while pictures of Maria flashed on two big screens behind the stage - her little white casket at the foot of the stage. She was buried in the "flower girl" dress she was going to wear in Emily's upcoming wedding.

Jeff Moore sang Steven's song "With Hope" which Steven wrote for a family years ago, going through the same type of tragedy. All of Maria's little friends came forward and placed a flower at the foot of the casket while Jeff sang.

The Chapmans are unwaivering in their love for Christ and doing well. Their entire family was a display of faith in practice at the most difficult time of their lives. No one in the family wore shoes, because the veil had been lifted for Maria. They were on "Holy Ground" and God's presence was felt.

Caleb (19) said in his prayer, "while we've always been excited about Heaven, it seems so much more real now...and gets us that much more excited to be there ourselves someday. So we'll live life on Earth as if each day counts until we get there.". He also said that although they are "confused" they've never been so sure about Christ and His saving grace. Caleb likened this to one of those abstract pictures that when you're up close, you can't see what it is, but as you step back, you start to see what the artist wants you to see. He said, "And this is a big picture, so we may have to stand waaayyy back."... but we will see what the Artist has designed and what the picture is.
He has his dad's wisdom - well beyond his years.

Emily Chapman (22) just got engaged and said that after the proposal, Maria was the only one who asked, "What did you say?". Maria asked it multiple times. (Of course Emily said "yes" to her future husband). But Emily addressed the 3000+ crowd and turned Maria's question back to everyone listening in regards to their answer to Christ's proposal to each of us,. "What did you say?". Powerful under these circumstances. The good news of the Gospel was presented four times throughout the ceremony by the family.

Steven was a rock and just gave all the glory to God. The model of a humble, Godly man. I'm so proud to call him a friend. His humility and appreciation for everyone there, which was a testament to his character and his sincere faith and love for his God and His son, Jesus Christ. As he hugged and cried with Kari and I, he just kept reminding us that "Heaven is real."

Steven shared that after the accident, in the hospital, he held Maria's lifeless body and cried out to God. He cried out, asking to somehow see some kind of sign that she was going to be okay...to see that she was going to be safe. When they got home that night, they found the last picture Maria drew on that Wednesday afternoon on her little art table (she loved to draw!). It was a flower and a butterfly and folded in half like a card. When Steven opened the card up, she had written one word on the inside - a word he didn't even know she knew how to spell. It was "See." A simple answer to his cry to 'see' that she was safe.

Please keep praying for them. They are worn out, sad and yet rejoicing in the Lord. Please pray for Will Franklin Chapman. He seems to be the one that is having the hardest time and struggling with the guilt of the accident. It truly was an accident. Will pulled the car into the driveway and because the family was throwing a party that night for Caleb's graduation, he decided to back the car up onto the grass just as Maria ran out behind the car to welcome him home. There was no way for him to know that Maria was behind that car. The Lord was ready to take Maria home. He knew the number of her days. Will stood with Maria's favorite pink blanket draped over his shoulders both days.

All in all God was glorified. Praise Him for His sovereign ways.

Steven Curtis Chapman - Urgent prayer!

For those of you who are close to my age, and maybe even some of the younger generation, who have been listening to Christian music for many years, you have heard of Steven Curtis Chapman. Well, I just read some tragic news from another friend's blog, and all the details have not been released, but he has a son who was pulling into their driveway last night and he hit and killed his 5 year old sister (adopted from China; they have 3 adopted girls from China). I can't even imagine what this family is going through. They have truly poured their life out for Christ and have lead the charge for adoption awareness especially in the Christian community these past many years. How hard it must be to make sense of this.

Please pray for this family as they travel this road for a long time, and that this situation will bring glory to the God they love and trust.

Tim Hawkins talks about Mom's, Parenting, and Homeschoolers

For all you Mom's out there who are still celebrating Mother's Day and Dad's who need a little laugh today... This guy is hysterical! I added another one on the bottom for all of you homeschool mom's, like myself.

Happy Mother's Day!!

I will post an entry later about my mom, but... I just had to post this...

BOSTON — If a stay-at-home mom could be compensated in dollars rather than personal satisfaction and unconditional love, she'd rake in a nifty sum of nearly $117,000 a year.

That's according to a pre-Mother's Day study released Thursday by Salary.com, a Waltham, Mass.-based firm that studies workplace compensation.

The eighth annual survey calculated a mom's market value by studying pay levels for 10 job titles with duties that a typical mom performs, ranging from housekeeper and day care center teacher to van driver, psychologist and chief executive officer.

This year, the annual salary for a stay-at-home mom would be $116,805, while a working mom who also juggles an outside job would get $68,405 for her motherly duties.

One stay-at-home mom said the six-figure salary sounds a little low.

"I think a lot of people think we sit and home and have a lot of fun and don't do a lot of work," said Samantha Russell, a Fremont, N.H., mother who left her job as pastry chef to raise two boys, ages 2 and 4. "But they should try cleaning their house with little kids running around and messing it up right after them."

Read more here.

... and I just want to say, "Where's my paycheck!!"

Life, Kidz Gig, New Job, and "House For Sale"

I have so much to say, but no time to say it... or don't know how to put it into words. God is at work in my life and it is the refining fire that hopefully turns into something beautiful. The highlight of my life right now (besides being with my husband and 4 wonderful kids) is helping in the Kidz Gig at church. I am actually the big group storyteller and sometimes worship leader and I absolutely love it. I don't think I have ever mentioned it, but one of my spiritual gifts is inciting energy in a crowd... and with kids ... well let's just say we are both over the top. I use to work with kids when I was in highschool and a little when I was single, and I forgot how much I love it. With kids you can be as excited and animated as you want to be.

I praise God for pushing me into this situation. I volunteered because they needed helpers, and God has brought me back to something I love and thrive in.

Also If any of you have been reading the last few weeks... Ken did get a job and a great one... the one he wanted out of all the jobs he applied for. It's interesting though, the first day before leaving for work he got a phone call from our contact in France with the IMB (International Mission Board), and he felt like it was just God saying, "Don't forget what I am preparing you for. I have called you to something greater." So now we need all the prayers from all our friends and family to sell our house against all odds in a downward economy... and the sooner the better. We are willing to live in a 2 room shack if God would just sell our house. So I have started praying for that family that is going to buy our house ... and believing that God is going to do more than what we could ask or imagine.

Well, I hope every one is well and I can hardly wait to be back in touch with you.