Christmas!... the best time of year!

Well, we survived!! Yes, we made it back home from our "Christmas Vacation" alive with only three congested coughs, two ear infections, and one sinus/ chest infection. Sounds like the end of the 12 days of Christmas. The house is still a wreck, suitcases not quite unpacked, laundry up to my eyeballs, but we're at least able to lay around in our own home while being sick.

We did have a wonderful Christmas Eve: first in the pediatrics "after hours" office, then lunch at a sandwhich shop (just our immediate noncontageous but sick family), and then we took the kids to see "The Nativity Story". Except for the passion, it was the most moving movie I have ever seen, even if I did have to watch it on the floor near the door to keep my 19 month old entertained and quiet so as not to disturb the theatre... and of course there were those three parts that I missed because I was taking a child to the potty. But even with all that, it was amazing to visually see (in a way) Jesus as a newborn baby... acting like a baby (and obviously I love babies) :-). It also really blew me away to see how Mary and Joseph were greatly looked down upon and how this pregnancy was looked on as illigitimate.

I mean Just imagine if this happened to a young couple we knew in our day and time. Here you have a young Godly couple ready to set out and serve the Lord, maybe go to the mission field, and the girl gets pregnant from someone else and then makes up this crazy super-spiritual story that she is impregnated by God. We would say what a kook and a slut. And Joseph we would label an idiot for staying with her. We sort of miss that part in telling the Christmas story don't we.

It reminded me again in such a real way to think Jesus really does understand our struggles. He came into the world as an outcast; first through his people, then through his parents. But those who sought out this Christ child, in faith, were a part of the most amazing act of history, and were written about in the most popular book ever written in history that will live on forever. I cried through most of the movie. (Oh the joys of being a mom of 4 small children. I love it!)

I pray not only I, but you also will be a seeker of the most amazing human in history this next year.

National Lampoons Vacation

Did you ever see the movie "National Lampoon's Vacation"?... Well we are on our Christmas vacation to Texas and it feels alot like that. You'll have to go to my hubby's blog to hear the narrated version. I will begin the story with some preliminary information.

We prayed and discussed which car we thought would make it to Texas, and which car would cost less to fix if it blew up on the side of the road. The older car, 1994 Plymouth Grand Voyager with only 168,000 miles, beat out the newer model, 1996 Dodge Grand Caravan with 254,000 miles, because the older car only had an axel problem and the newer car had a transmission problem... lesser of the two evils. So we chose the older car, and so far we have made it to Texas, but it has been an adventure to say the least and it has had nothing to do with the car.

After getting off late, turning around three times because we forgot stuff, lots of throwup from a flu but that hit the whole family for at least 4 days, having to go shopping for all the things we did forget, a wrong turn costing us two hours with a sick family, bringing all the wrong clothes for 50 degree weather and it being in the 70's and 80's, no air conditioning because all the freeon leaked out of our car, a trip to the emergency room for a dog bite (our oldest son got bit and scratched pretty bad by Grandpa's dog), and... well this is just the highlights and our trip is only halfway done and I just smile and laugh everytime another situations arises. You have to go read my Hubby's blog to get the details.

Even when we were throwing up in ziplock baggies and not even slowing down for someone who got sick... it became quite humorous; especially sitting in the emergency room... it makes me laugh even just writing about it. I can't even imagine that anything else could happen... but I have learned not to hold my breath, because I could pass out and die waiting for "normal" to hit my family.

Blogging Blues

I hate that I have not blogged in almost two weeks. I guess if I had any following I have pretty much killed that by now. I know how I get when I am excited to see what someone has posted only to find they haven't had the time either.

I don't think I've ever blogged about us finishing our upstairs (the main reason we bought this house). Okay so it's taken us (I say us, but it is really my husband) three years to have it livable, and now we're down to the painstaking finish work : the second coat of paint, finish all the trim, finish the bathroom, etc., and then the moving of furniture (which of course means you have to paint that horrible looking shelf - all while kids toys and books lay around everywhere).

And then of course there's the never-ending, ever-growing laundry that gets pushed to the side to that you can do this extra-curricular activity. Have I ever mentioned that I hate clutter... but I do not have an organized mind, therefore I live in lots of clutter that drives me crazy.

... and with all this, Ken is out of town for three days and all my kids have a stomach bug that between them has lasted 7 days... and it comes out both ends.

So when I feel bad about not blogging, God reminds me that: I am a child of God first (in need of a relationship with Him), a wife and mom second; there are alot of people living in horrible circumstances around the world, many going to hell because they've never heard a clear presentation of the gospel; I am running and racing like I never thought I would again; and I am blessed with health, a wonderful husband, and four healthy beautiful kids... blogging is just a perk I love to do in my spare time. :-)

Consider this...

This week is adoption awareness week on Family Life radio show. Please go to "Voice Of The Orphan" .org. ... then I ask you to search your heart... and think of the most challenging situation happening in your life right now... and then think of the millions of orphans around the world, many living in situations we cannot even imagine... and then think, "if I were a child or baby living in an institution (even the best of institutions) wouldn't I want for someone to choose me... to know what it feels like to belong?"... think of the special needs children who have an even lesser chance of being adopted... and then think again about the challenging situation in your life today...

Think on all these things... go to some of the pictures on the websight and read about the children. Look into their eyes and their hearts and imagine what a day is like for them... and then imagine a week, a month, a year, and then 5 years knowing that the older they get the less likely anyone would want them... and then think of our Savior as he hung there on the cross... beaten bruised torn for us... for them... and think "what would Jesus do if He were here?"

...I don't think He'd come to my house, or my church, maybe not even my country. I think he'd go and find all these kids and say, "you are so precious... so very very precious. I am so sorry this world has thrown you away... but I love you... and you are more special than you could ever know, and I loved you even before I ever met you. Please come home with me.

Did you know that if only 7% of Christians around the world would adopt there would be no more orphans?

"I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these... you did for me."
Matt. 25:40

Trick or Treat?

Well, our family joined the heathens last week walking around in the dark on the side of the road going up to stranger's houses and asking for candy. What a great holiday. :-) We had two cowboys, a policeman, and a fire(wo)man... so we knew we were safe.

I have never actually looked up the history of Halloween, but I know it is suppose to be something evil. I like to look at it as a way to leverege one of "satan's" holidays. The past few years we have used Halloween as a way to meet neighbors we had not gotten the chance to meet yet, or a way to build on already made relationships... and it has worked well. We don't go out of our neighborhood, it is not about getting candy, but we especially like to go to those houses where it doesn't look like many people go.

I love using something Satan means for evil, for good...for my God to use later for lost souls.

My hubby's blog

Check out my hubby's blog this week. He has some great stories that really cracked me up; one especially about the crazy things parents do.

Home is where the heart is

Once again its been a few weeks since I have blogged. Since we have returned from London and France it has taken a few weeks for me to get my house in order (meaning get my kids back under control), and finally get my suitcase unpacked. On top of all that, the workers are finally coming to finish the drywall, paint, and carpet on our unfinished upstairs. To work on our unfinished upstairs (which was our storage) we have had to move all sorts of stuff into our 1300 sq foot downstairs. In the midst of all this it is a season change, meaning lots of boxes out and left open for four kids as it turns cold then hot then cold then hot again. Oh and can we forget 4 kids ages 6 and under running in around in a cluttered house. So its safe to say there has been alot of choas around here.

I say all this to say my heart is firm and my eyes set fast... for France. As October comes and goes, and our time frame for leaving comes and goes, we realize we will probably not leave for France before the new year... which is fine, because we know who put the stars in the sky and hung the earth in space and parted the waters which created France.

We know that Christ loves the French even more than we do. Our hearts are a little sad knowing there are unchurched nonbelievers there waiting for us to come. We had a Christmas party envisioned in our head as a great ground breaker to meet our neighbors, and for others to bring friends... but we know who took dirt from the earth to create a man and then took a rib from that man to create a women.

We know the man who made the blind to see, healed the sick, and raised the dead. We know the God who loved man so much that he spared nothing to reach him. So, what is it that can keep us from going to France... nothing (except for maybe ourselves if we choose not to grow for God to use us). So pray that God would open the floodgates of His miraculous power to get not only us, but all of our teammates to France at the same time as soon as His perfect will allows. We know He wants to show us His power, it is just gets hard to wait when your heart is already there.

World Traveler

Wow, it's been a few weeks since I have blogged about anything...

So much has happened I don't know where to start. I've been to London and Paris and back. An amazing story to get there, and many amazing stories while we were there and since we've been back. I hope to share them with you. God is so amazing. We are so ready to be in Paris. We actually have people on the ground waiting for us... nonchristians!! We are so excited!

We believe God has something so huge we can't even imagine. As I walked the streets of Paris and saw the babies (you never see children over 3 because they are in preschool and school) my heart broke thinking these kids have almost no opportunity to hear the gospel. As I walked on the streets I also thought, "I have walked for hours the past two days and could very well have never passed a Christian."

It's overwhelming, my life will never be the same, my kids will not have a normal childhood, they may very well not grow up with grass in their yard ... but I'm excited about what God wants to do. Our comfort is not worth 59 million people going to hell with no opportunity to hear the gospel.

I am linking you to my husbands blog again. I don't know why he is blogging about me so much, but I'm surprised how he really knows me. 8 years, maaaaaaaany struggles, often hanging on to a relationship with nothing but faith in a Big God, He knows where I've been and where I want to go. He also knows the dreams you don't tell anybody about because they are crazy. I guess he really was listening all those times I got mad at him for "not listening". :-) Well if you want to know a little more about me, visit my sweetheart's blog.

Matt 25:37 Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go and visit you? The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me. "

A cry of help from the President of World Vision US:

For the past several months, I've been sharing with you about the dramatic hunger crisis in Africa. So many of you have blessed us with your prayers and generous support, and we've been able to work in the hardest-hit areas, but the situation remains serious because recent rains have not been adequate. I'm haunted by tragic scenes in countries like Somalia, Kenya, Ethiopia, Tanzania, and Burundi. Crowds of desperate mothers hope to receive help for their severely malnourished babies and children. Now the situation has been complicated by floods which have led to disease outbreaks in several areas.


Drought, combined with terrible poverty, civil unrest, and disease, is threatening the lives of an estimated 8 million people — 1.6 million are children under the age of five! That's why I'm turning to you once more with the same urgent plea that I sent in the mail in July. We have a great opportunity to help save lives! Because we've received $107 million in U.S. government food grants, your gift today, combined with these grants, will go 8 times as far to provide lifesaving food for desperate children and families. Please ... Pray that God will direct the aid to the boys and girls who need it most, before it's too late; and for our staff in the field — that they'll be able to shine God's love as they work with these hungry children and families in the midst of adversity. Give online now at http://news.worldvision.org/W8RH03AE9B6792ED1BC7F33E5E7800 to help provide much-needed food, water, and other emergency assistance. Remember—your gift will multiply 8 times! Sponsor another child online in Africa at http://news.worldvision.org/W8RH03AE9B37B2ED1BC7F33E5E7800, to help with long-term recovery projects that will transform the life of that child, his family and community. I thank God for your support in faith, prayer, and action. Thank you for being such a blessing to so many people in need, to our staff all over the world, and to me personally!

Yours in Christ, Rich StearnsPresident, World Vision U.S.

What will God say to you when you get to heaven? What have you done unto the least of these?
Help me change the world one life at a time.

Check out what my husband thinks about my training/running. I had an awesome run today!

I love this blog! www.verymom.com

Since I have 4 very small kids I don't get to blog or read blogs as much as I would like, but you have to go to her blogs for Sept. 7 and 5. She has such an amazing way of putting into words what most of us women think and want to write but just aren't creative enough. One blog is very funny in her creative style, but the other blog is very sad. A situation that as a mom every one of us fear.

I hope you will read this and then pray for her. It's pretty obvious that she is not a believer, and it is when I get to know people like this that I become more passionate about what we are going to do in France... plant an exciting relevant lifegiving church. It makes me sad that I can not go out to Utah or Idaho and plant one of these churches. I think it would reach someone like this.

Because of her Sept. 7 blog, my heart is sad this evening for a family that has to continue life without their mother. I know there are situations like this all over the world... which always brings me back to the children all over the world that survive with no parents and no food, children sold as sex slaves, abused kids, broken families, neglected kids, ... but aren't we all just grown up kids... and don't we all just need Jesus. I wish I could save the world... but I can't. Jesus already did all that he could do, now it is up to us... and what are we willing to give up for the world to know Christ?

I haven't mentioned children's cup (ChildrensCup.org) in a few blogs and would like to bring some light to it. It is the 26th day of praying for the children of Africa and the ministries working with them; especially those children with aids who are typically orphaned and don't have enough food. It is so easy to live on this side of the world and forget of the suffereing so many children and adults live on a daily basis. We just have no idea. I often read about the suffering of people in third world countries or watch a special on T.V. and just cry and cry, but what have I done about it? I can turn my computer off, or T.V. off, or close my magazine and forget about it 15 seconds later as I deal with the "cares" of my own life which is usually something like dealing with my children who are fighting over the 1 millionth toy that they own.

Am I really broken about what I see, or do I just not want to have to see it? We as Americans have this incredible ability to live life in a vaccume. If I just don't want to be reminded of these tragedies that go on, I just say a short prayer, cry a few tears, and turn my T.V. off. But if I really care, why don't I give to someone God has called to go, or give to an organization that provides food for these people? And then as the Bible says, "where you treasure is there your heart will be also." Therefore, because I give I will be reminded to pray for the people and organizations who help them.

We all need to put ourselves in the position of these children we see on T.V. or read about. First of all I can't imagine being an orphan; not feeling the love of a parent who feeds and cares for and protects you. Have you ever had just a bowlful of oatmeal a day for a few days, and then imagine that for months and years; or eating leaves off of trees and drinking muddy water because that's all there is? Have you ever heard a baby cry because they are hungry, and then imagine that cry until they cannot cry anymore because they are dying. I was reminded of this when I breastfed my last three children and did not produce enough milk for them most of the time; especially if I was out and did not have a backup milk supply. It was very frustrating to feel helpless to provide for my child and I thought of mothers in places like Africa, and cried for them imagining how helpless they felt in not being able to feed their children.

Just imagine... and then do something!! There are so many good organizations out there ministering both physically and spiritually to these people. Find one today! Don't let another minute go by where we ignore what we cannot see. If that were you or your child wouldn't you want someone to help?

The most hillarious blog I have ever read! beauty school drop out
I hope to find more. I came across a blog site yesterday called blogHer. It's basically a blog site for normal average women... and lots of moms!! So far I absolutely love it.

As I am just learning this blogging world, I am still not sure how to navigate through this web of information, put links on my blog site, and sometimes can't find a site I found when I want to go back to it. I pretty much have to ask my husband to do everything. So I hope to get better at this and link you to some of these great sites. In the meantime bear with me :-) and I hope you will keep reading.

I ran 10 miles today with a double baby jogger. At church tonight I cried as we sang praise songs realizing what God has given me.

Now I know most of you say, "yeah, I'd be crying too if I ran 10 miles..." But if you knew me you'd know ...it's just a part of me to run.... And the older I get the more I love it and appreciate every step I am able to take.

I say that because my body has been riddled with pain over the past 15 years. To begin with I struggled for years after college with plantar faccii which can cause severe pain at the front of the heel where the muscle and ligaments attache. God lead me to a Christian chiropractor that adjusted my feet which took all the pain away where I have never had any trouble with that since.

I also struggle with a type of degenerative disease called ankylosing splonditis (A type of arthritis) that I now control totally by my diet (which doctors don't like to beleive). I have to eat extremely healthy (organic, not much meat) and have to absolutely stay away from nighshade vegatables (green peppers, eggplant,...), potatoes, and yeast breads. Now if you think about it, that is pretty much the American diet. I lived off bagels and potatoes during college and my 20's. Anyway after my fourth child and alot of heel pain (which the doctors also can't diagnose - which I think is caused by fallen arches due to pregnancy), I praise God for every step I take.

I was planning to run 7 easy miles today around our country block since I was going to have to take two of my kids in the baby jogger... and when I was coming to the normal turnoff to our house, I felt God tugging at me to go straight at the crossroads. I thought, "that is crazy, I had just ran 8 miles the day before with the baby jogger and today was suppose to be an easy day." But I kept feeling like I was suppose to go this way, so I did... and not only did I get the awesome feeling of completing a 10 mile run at a good pace pushing an extra 75 lbs., but we passed a group of about 9 covered wagons, which as a beginning homeschool mom, is a very exciting visual lesson of what people rode in before we had cars. My kids loved it and so did I. I even called my husband on my cell phone (I take one for emergencies like flat tires, heat exhaustion, tired :-) and asked him to bring our oldest child which is my newest homeschool "guinei pig", since he is such a visual learner and would never forget the lesson.

So I sit back even in more awe of God and how much He cares about my dreams (running in the Olympics) and my joys (homeschooling)... even if they often sound a little crazy to everyone else. The Bible says, "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." I am a living testimony of that... and I even get to go to France to be a missionary. I am speechless.

As I have sat here many days trying to conjure up something profound to write I decided to read some of the blogs my husband reads. I am not sure how to make links from my blog yet (I am a little computer illiterate...my husband keeps me in the 21st century), but when I do, I will put some of these links on my blog page. The blog I read this morning was evotional.com by Mark Patterson of National Community Church in Washington, DC.

We fell in love with him when we saw a spoof on his websight on "Riverdance". It was great, especially since Ken & I had just seen Riverdance for the first time. Since then we have met him and visited his church which meets in 3 locations in DC; two theatres and a coffee house. We became more and more interested in his ministry seeing that this may be how we find places in France to meet in large groups and to reach people where they are at. It's an amazing concept.

Anyway, that is not the reason I am blogging about him. If you read his most recent blog he talks about being in Gelapagos. I am not even sure where that is, so I am going to have to look it up... but he says it feels like he is at the end of the earth. It is also a place that has no church and no access to the gospel.

It really got me thinking since I have a heart for this type of people, but I find myself going to France... who God has now given me the same type of burden. These people have access to the Gospel, but they don't see that it has any relevance whatsoever to their life.

For example let's say there is a college in my town that has a class on Mideival History. Why in the world would I want to take the class and learn about it? I hate history, or I should say never did well in history in school. Now if there began a "buzz" in the marketplace about this class and how fun it was and how the information was changing their lives, it would make me want to go check it out.

So my question is who are the unreached? Just because Christianity is in their history, and it is not illegal to sell Bibles in their country... if you cannot get them to look at it, are they not just as unreached as those in Muslim countries? It's all about relevance. If we don't present the Gospel in a relevant way in Europe, as well as Asia and the Middle East and other similar areas, are we not sending a generation of Europe to hell saying you have access to Scripture so you're on your own?

That is why I am so excited that God has chosen me to go to France. In this I see his love for these people and His desire to reach anyone who will respond to him whether they have access or not.

Today is my birthday and just wanted to introduce you to my son Levi. Levi is an amazing kid. He is only 5 and yet he has the ability to see what is important to people and respond to them at just the right time. He is very considerate and polite and never wants to see someone hurting. He also has this incredible mind that reads people very well. I had to laugh today when he(knowing that you put your favorite thing on your birthday cake) said, "mommy we need to put the Olympics or Fox News on your birthday cake.

I guess when you watch the Olympics literally 24 hours a day for 2 weeks it leaves an impression on your children. We even have a DVR so you can record everything, pause it anytime, and never miss an event. We were two days behind most of the time... but I didn't miss anything. My children would get where if I had to leave the room for anything they would pause the TV for me.

Of course maybe it's because even at 39 I still have this crazy dream of making an Olympic Team and when their mom gets up at 6 in the morning to run, or when they are strapped in a baby jogger at 2 in the afternoon with 100 degree heat index maybe they pick up on Mom's crazy psychosis.

And well Fox News... what can I say...I'm a junkie. So there you have it. That is who I am in a nut shell. Isn't it nice to know someone in your family really gets you, even if it isn't your husband. :-)

Today starts the first day of prayer for Children's Cup! What is Children's Cup you ask? Well, I will try to share a little, but you can find out much more about it at childrenscup.org.




My husband heard about this ministry from a guy named Dan Olerking who has a heart that is hard to describe for the children of Africa that experience all the things we only see through our television sets. I have often sat and cried when I watched the specials on TV about starving children in other parts of the world many without parents or shelter, and wondered what I could do. This ministry let's people like us make a difference in the lives of children when God has not called us to go.

Children's Cup's purpose is to take humanitarian and spiritual aid into the hard places where war, natural disasters and disease epidemics have devastated societies.These children in hard places know horrors our children have never heard of. Food, shelter, medicine and education are not enough to heal their emotions. Most have been sexually abused, beaten and some have even been forced to murder and maim as child warriors.They need hope. Hope's name is Jesus!
Their work currently focuses heavily on Swaziland, but efforts continue in Zimbabwe and Vietnam. In the "What We Do" section of this website, you can learn about what we do in these countries.

I hope you will join me in praying, because if you have read any of my other blogs I am continually reminded that God cares about even the smallest of needs, how much more would he care about the hurting children of Africa and answer our prayers in a powerful way.

This morning as I was reading my Bible I realized that Noah was the great great great great grandson of Cain. Yes, Cain. The first son of Adam and Eve. The son who gave God "fruits of the soil" for a sacrifice. The son that God did not look on with favor because of this sacrifice. The son who became angry because of this. The son who killed his brother because of his anger. The son who was cursed because of this murder and was driven from the land. Yes, this was the son that had a descendant that God chose because this descendant (Noah) was the only righteous man on earth who, the Bible says, "walked with God."

Wow, doesn't that give you hope that God can still use your existence even if you have messed up big time.

Now that is not the only thing I got from this story. The passage says:

Gen. 4: 4 The Lord looked with favor on Able and his offering, but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast.
Then the Lord said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it."

The one thing that kept popping into my head when I was reading this was "Joel Olsteen"! I know that sounds crazy, and I am not a Joel Olsteen groupie, but I just realized how important what he preaches is. (and I guess I have just promoted his new book, "Your best life now"). I realized how negative attitudes can lead to sin, and I can look back over my life and see how negative thoughts led to me behaving in wrong ways, which led to consequenses that have determined the direction of my life. Now that doesn't mean we should be fake and gooey happy all the time, but if we can take our thoughts off of what appers to be a crummy or horrible situation and focus on and continually think on what the Bible really says about us and our life and the world and God, we won't be meditating about our bad situation... and our attitude will automatically change... and then

"All things [can] work together for good for those who love God and who are called according to his purpose..." and God can take a messed up life and change the course of the world.

I use to think going to the pool was fun. I stood there laughing at myself as I stood two feet from the side of the pool where my 5 year old, my 3 year old, and my 2 year old were playing in the shallow end while standing two feet from my stroller where my 1 year old was happily sweltering in the sun thinking this is normal. (He doesn't yet realize that 1 year olds do actually go swimming. :-)

As I stand there looking at the cool water getting my feet wet every few minutes to stable a falling child, feeling splashes from the pool every so often to cool my baking skin, asking some stranger to watch two of my kids in the water and one child on land so I can take another one to the bathroom... I am reminded why I haven't been to the pool since it opened two months ago. It makes me laugh even more to read this and imagine what I looked like. I think we'll just stick with our 2 1/2 foot deep pool in our back yard for now. At least here I can get wet.

For all of you soccer fans, yesterday was a sad day in France. Not only did the French National soccer team lose to Italy, but they lost on a bad note. The man who was voted the best soccer player of the world cup tournament, head butted another player in the chest throwing him to the ground because of a racial slur in the last few minutes of the game. He got a red card throwing him out of the game and he walked to the locker room not to return even for the awards ceremony.

Ken and I were very sad. We loved Zidane. He was one of the oldest players of the game and came out of retirement to help his country win a World Cup, and many people believed he would had done that had he not been thrown out of the game.

My heart broke for him because isn't that so much like many of us. Just as our greatest moment has the possibility of becoming a reality, we blow it before the end of the "race" or "game" and before the awards. We end up walking away embarrassed for how we reacted or responded wishing no one had ever seen that. We forget that God says in Romans 12 "it is mine to avenge says the Lord." We feel like we must win the argument or fight, or we must pay back a wrong someone has done to us. We often do these things behind closed doors in the privacy of our own home where God, in His grace, spares us the public humiliation. But God has seen everything.

I have been trying to teach my kids that we are suppose to return evil with good, and if their brother or sister is mean to them then they must think of something nice to do for them. 1 Peter 3:9 says, "Do not repay evil with evil, or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing." It is definitely easier for me to teach them this, than to put into practice, because my human nature (especially as a competitive athlete) is to "head butt the other guy in the chest." Of course I've never actually head butted Ken in the chest :-), but figuratively speaking I've done it hundreds of times.

Pray for Zidane's salvation. He is an Algerian who was raised in France and has probably never heard of our Savior. This is just another one of my dreams: to reach athletes like Zidane who have a platform they can use for God's glory.

God is so awesome!! I don't know why any of us ever stop praying for something and believing that God will do it.

I put in one blog about my struggle one day with my kids and I don't know if it was just my prayer or if my friends were praying who read it, but the next day I woke up and I had wisdom in dealing with my kids! When they were disobeying or not responding when I was talking to them or calling them, God gave me wisdom in the heat of the moment and now my husband and I are implementing this new protocol in training and discipline... and it's working!! Why am I so shocked? God just never ceases to amaze me!

He knows what we need when we need it and is often just waiting for us to ask. There is probably so much he wants to give us that we miss out on because we try to figure it out ourselves or do it on our own. We read books, we talk to our friends, we join groups, which are all good, but sometimes God just wants us to turn to Him; to acknowledge that He is Creator of the Universe, that He can meet all of our needs. Why is it so hard for us to understand that He personally would want to give us the wisdom we need to raise the child He created?

Jesus says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks the door will be opened.
Which of you , if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?"

Thank you Jesus for loving us so much! You're so awesome!

Were you ever so ashamed of your actions that you were embarrassed to pray to God? I sure hope my kids don't need too much counseling when they get older :-) I don't know why it shocks me so much that they are ungrateful, complain, talk back, argue, test every boundary set... but don't we do the same things... don't I do the same thing toward my husband? I mean I actually threw a fit today in front of them because they didn't follow the hundreth command I had given them, and then I wonder where they get it from.

"Please forgive me Lord and help me recognize that yelling doesn't change their hearts or glorify You. It only brings shame on me and You. Thank you for your forgiveness. Please give me wisdom in the heat of the moment, and protect my kids hearts from their maniac mom :-).

Give ear to my words O Lord, consider my sighing.
Listen to my cry for help, my King and my God, for to you I pray.
Morning by morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; morning by morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.

But I, by your great mercy, will come into your house; in reverence will I bow down toward your holy temple.
Lead me, O Lord, in your righteousness because of my enemies- make straight your way before me.

Psalm 5:1-3, 7-8

As I read this passage to my kids tonight as they were going to bed, I realized this was my prayer as we prepare to go to France. As we enter into this new realm of what I call "charging hell with a water pistol", I really do believe God wants to drench France with the power of the Holy Spirit, and may He use us to do that.

Even as I say that statement, I think, "in reverence will I bow down toward your holy temple. Lead me in your righteousness because of my enemies- make straight your way before me." I have no clue which way to turn to raise up generations to come to praise my God, but He does.

I want so badly to make a difference in this world. I want so badly to be righteous enough for God to use me.

I pray the power of God be poured out on France in spite of me.

Did any of you see the upset of France beating Brazil in the semifinals for the world cup? Ken and I were once again jumping up and down around our house (we seem to do that a lot). More importantly did you see the French fans? They were jumping up and down and going crazy. Now my philosophy is if we can get crazy for a sports team or rock concert, as believers we should get just as excited about our God. So I now have a new dream and that is to fill a soccer stadium with French people all shouting and singing praises to God, and I believe it will happen and God will allow me to be a part of pulling it off. (Now if you truly know me you know that would be a God thing because I can hardly organize meals for a week more less anything with details.) :-)

This was written initially for our Team France (a group of us going over to Paris, France to plant a church), but I thought it had some awesome truths others might benefit from.

Is everybody getting excited about France?! Are you packing your bags? Are you believing and speaking the impossible. Ken and I tell people without hesitation that we are leaving in September- October. This week the Bible story the kids and I are doing all week is the story where Jesus feeds the 5,000 through the boy who gave Jesus 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread. We talked about how 2 fish and 5 loaves of bread could not even feed our family… and yet at just the right time God multiplied the food to not only the right amount, but they had food left over.

As I look at our support and as most of you look at yours, what’s coming in monthly right now could not even feed your family for a month, but Ken and I believe God wants to show himself through our team, not only in planting a large vibrant church, but also in how we get there. We also believe that Avant (the organization we are going with) took into account many issues, and spent much time in prayer in choosing this time table. Therefore we believe God is going to do it. This is just one of the many first and crazy things we are going to believe so that the world can see all of Jesus and none of us.

Boy I am tired!!! As you've probably noticed I have not blogged in many weeks. I forgot about survival as a mom on an every day basis with somewhere between 4-6 hours of sleep a night. As I write this blog at 10:30 at night there is at least four loads of clean laundry on the couch, a kitchen that still needs to be cleaned for the evening, my room and the kid's rooms that need staightened..... and on top of all this we are packing to leave for the beach tomorrow. At least I have started on the packing and am almost done with the suitcases and packing the car.

Yes, this is my typical life.... which I have this love/hate relationship with :-). But I know God is working in me. I know God is big. I know God has the ability to show up anytime He wants. I often just have to remember to ask. And for those of you who know we are raising support to follow God's call to help plant a dynamic relevant church in France, this week has been pretty bad according to men's standards... but according to God's plans and the way He performs His greatest miracles, it's par for the course. Daily I am reminded of Elijah and the prophets of baal where God brought down fire from heaven to burn up a soaking wet sacrifice; Noah who built a boat without ever seeing rain, or a large body of water; Moses who parted the red sea just when the Egyptians arrived, not too soon or too late; Joshua who praised God and watched the walls of Jericho fall down;... and Jesus who raised not only Lazarus from the dead, but also Himself to pay for our sins.

I am so humbled to think that God would want to use me. I have to continue to remind myself that Jesus most often chose the unlikely, the most unlovely, the ones who messed up the most, the uncool... Ken and I right now feel like so many people look at us in one of these ways, ... but we know that God has called us and He can make up for all our weaknesses and inadequacies, our uncoolness and our messed up lives... and because He called us He will provide. On top of all this, we believe He wants us in France by September/ October. Now that's where the great miracle comes in! We have more support to raise than we physically could do, except for that God show up. So we praise God daily, like Joshua who watched God tear down a huge wall with no human physical strength, exitedly awaiting to see how He is going to do this because outside of winning the lottery or befriending a millionaire, this is absolutely impossible in our own abilities.

I have decided that this blogger thing is one of the most amazing concepts ever invented. You can say anything you want to, feel like someone is listening and actually cares, and then answer yourself if no one else does. You can even imagine that you're funny or have an intelligent comment.

I've realized that even if I don't have any adult conversation in a day I can feel like someone is listening even if no one actually is. I thought how brilliant. This could save us hundreds in counseling :-)

I want to start this morning by introducing my husband to you. He is a bigger (or at least as big) a visionary as myself...or maybe he just explains himself a little better. We are totally incompatible by the worlds standards and certainly would never have met on E-Harmony.com. He barely meets any of my needs, and I meet very few of his...yet the God of the universe chose to bring us together. We often wondered if we (Ken & I) had made a mistake in the mate we chose, but now if you ask me, as I see the path God is leading us in, I wouldn't want to be any other place in this world. I feel like I am going to make an astronomical difference in the "Kingdom of God" because of who I am married to. If we are, as the Bible says, "as iron sharpens iron", Ken and I create major fire when we sharpen one another, and I believe we together, with the God of the universe, are just niave enough to think we can charge hell with a water pistol.

Now he still doesn't fill very many of my needs, and I am still clueless to his, but we are more in love with each other today than we ever thought possible. So if your marriage seems hopeless and you wake up some days thinking I married the wrong person, take heart, don't give up, hang in there until you can hang no longer, and then keep hanging. God is bigger than any need you have or any mistakes you've made, and He will show up. Who knows, maybe God never intended Ken & I to be together, but because of our undying devotion to Him and our iron will to not give up hope, He has decided to show His power by taking our personal mess and change the world, just to bring Him glory and give you hope.

Hello to everyone or no one because I'm not sure who would be interested in reading what a 38 year old former (very competitive) runner and mother of four (ages 5,3,2,and 1 -no there's not alot to do in Youngsville, NC :-) would have to say. Actually I take that back. A 38 year old mother who has survived four kids, getting to old to do what she loves best, and contemplating mid-life crisis, should have alot to say about how she survived four children, is still married, and is not on some type of legal drug, or locked up somewhere becuse she went postal (especially if all four of her children are within five years of each other).

Maybe some of you reading this are supermoms and are exceedingly blessed with the gift of organization and management. Well, I scored really low in those categories on those types of tests, so it's safe to say motherhood has been by far the biggest challenge of my life. Well, that and trying to figure out my husband, and how to do that whole submission thing.

I do score really high on hanging out with people and meeting complete strangers and making them feel like friends. So I guess you could come over and we could discuss our struggles and joys of life and motherhood over coffee (don't mind the screaming in the background, if there's no blood, it's still a good day) and it would be safe to say if my house is clean, don't open the closets :-)