Boy I am tired!!! As you've probably noticed I have not blogged in many weeks. I forgot about survival as a mom on an every day basis with somewhere between 4-6 hours of sleep a night. As I write this blog at 10:30 at night there is at least four loads of clean laundry on the couch, a kitchen that still needs to be cleaned for the evening, my room and the kid's rooms that need staightened..... and on top of all this we are packing to leave for the beach tomorrow. At least I have started on the packing and am almost done with the suitcases and packing the car.
Yes, this is my typical life.... which I have this love/hate relationship with :-). But I know God is working in me. I know God is big. I know God has the ability to show up anytime He wants. I often just have to remember to ask. And for those of you who know we are raising support to follow God's call to help plant a dynamic relevant church in France, this week has been pretty bad according to men's standards... but according to God's plans and the way He performs His greatest miracles, it's par for the course. Daily I am reminded of Elijah and the prophets of baal where God brought down fire from heaven to burn up a soaking wet sacrifice; Noah who built a boat without ever seeing rain, or a large body of water; Moses who parted the red sea just when the Egyptians arrived, not too soon or too late; Joshua who praised God and watched the walls of Jericho fall down;... and Jesus who raised not only Lazarus from the dead, but also Himself to pay for our sins.
I am so humbled to think that God would want to use me. I have to continue to remind myself that Jesus most often chose the unlikely, the most unlovely, the ones who messed up the most, the uncool... Ken and I right now feel like so many people look at us in one of these ways, ... but we know that God has called us and He can make up for all our weaknesses and inadequacies, our uncoolness and our messed up lives... and because He called us He will provide. On top of all this, we believe He wants us in France by September/ October. Now that's where the great miracle comes in! We have more support to raise than we physically could do, except for that God show up. So we praise God daily, like Joshua who watched God tear down a huge wall with no human physical strength, exitedly awaiting to see how He is going to do this because outside of winning the lottery or befriending a millionaire, this is absolutely impossible in our own abilities.